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Bucket List/Anniversary/Birthday Week

 I'm sorry for the long space between posts but life has been a bit crazy the last few months. I decided that my home was still too crowded after the addition of a TV and a Loveseat so I've been systematically removing things and cleaning with a goal to have a more comfortable house that I like by Samhain. Or rather my GD#1's sperm donor has been helping by cleaning up things at my behest. I am grateful for his help as it means I don't need to get a PSW or pay for a housekeeper that won't do basics like the dishes. Slowly but surely it is getting done.  I did not get my wish for a quiet birthday but it could have been worse. They could have decided to make a big deal out of it instead of just one of three birthdays we celebrated one after the other with cake and good food. We even managed a Thanksgiving dinner albeit a bit early. And then today my ever-loving granted a wish from my bucket list. I get to sleep in a real castle! Well, I guess it isn't really a cas
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 It's been most of a year now and I find that I want to get back to publishing my blog a bit more often. To that end, I've been thinking about how I want to do it so it is still fun. I don't write to make money though I suppose donations are always acceptable. I write because I often have a lot on my mind and need to get it out. That is how this blog was created in the first place. As a place to share the stuff in my head in a way that might be useful to others. One of the things I need to do is change my focus a bit, I have not been cooking or researching much except on Pinterest. If I bring some of that stuff over here to share? Maybe? I'm still trying to get it straight in my head. I am thinking that a name change might be in order but again I'm fuzzy on the details.  I'll share once I have a few pieces worked out in my head.

Lessons 8 & 9

 #8 Summer is my worst time for writing anything. I have a story inside me that bugs me constantly to be told but other than a lot of background info on him & his people and the world they live in I can find no adventure to send him on. As soon as I try all I get are details from the point before the point I want the story to begin and nothing about the adventure itself. I have been considering if I need to change my audience group, just tell the story from the beginning and hope the adventure will eventually make itself known to me or just illustrate what I have written and hope it is enough. or maybe switch to a different medium altogether. Or maybe just try to erase it from my head altogether. The other writing I have done and would like to complete is a booklet of 100 poetry types complete with poems I have written in each of the styles. This is more of a polish-up and print kind of thing that has been hanging 'round longer than the story above.  I wonder if anyone would ev

Lesson 7

 I found the cure for too much computer time, it's called TV. Simple huh? The best part is I can do nearly everything on the TV that I used to be able to do on the computer. I'm looking into a way to get books on it  but until then I have a lot of video channels I can watch plus YouTube for all the fun stuff like exercise & music. Its a win win and with the addition of a console of some sort the possibilities become even more. It does mean that unless I keep messenger open on my phone or tablet I'm going to be out of touch a fair am until I get tired of videos

Lesson 6

 Sometimes going back to YOUR neighbourhood is not a good idea! I have seen and heard a lot of fucked up stuff in this neighbourhood since I moved back 5 years ago but today it hit close to home.  I saw my granddaughter put herself into a situation that could have turned deadly. Since she has some basic police training she handled it well but it reminded me that when I came back to the place I call home I came back to a dangerous neighbourhood. In my time here it has gotten worse but then so has the world at large. But it was my granddaughter out on the front line today, I was immensely proud and terrified at the same time. She called it a live-fire training. She wants to be able to get through something like that and not be emotionally wrecked by it, I do not want her to lose her tender heart.  I love her and I love my neighbourhood and I REALLY wish she had not followed me here. She says she is exactly where she needs to be because this neighbourhood will help her strengthen her wall

Lesson 5

 What do you do when you receive an apology for a long-ago hurt? A hurt that you were not aware you still carried? A hurt that was nearly 40 years old? Not a hurt a great sadness, a sadness for a love long gone.  To receive an apology for it seems stupid yet it causes confusion in my mind. His words a reminder that his childhood was worse than mine and yet I had sat in judgment of him. Seeing him as an abuser when he had been abused so much worse than he ever did to me. The automatic reaction to his words, he is lying... Why because that has always been my reaction when he talks about the things he has accomplished. Disbelief ... why? When did I decide that he was a liar? When did I decide that he could accomplish nothing, would never accomplish anything? I wonder if that man in B.C. had mesmerized me after all? It was on that trip back that I decided he was a liar. It was after that trip to B.C. that everything started to collapse. I do not remember the trip back at all. What happened

Lesson 4

 Family has the ability to hurt you even family you hardly know. I have a grand-daughter (GD#2) who is expecting a child, a little girl, my first great-grandchild. This GD and her father have a stormy relationship and so we have interacted rarely. She has grown into a right prissy miss and though I have tried to keep the communication lines open it hasn't worked out well. Three days ago she IM'ed me to see if I had ordered some fancy-dancy baby sling she wanted. Her father apparently said I had. I was supposed to but I forgot so it didn't get bought. She accused her father of lying and said something about communication. I told her she could always get herself a cheaper version. I made reference to her pulling up her bra straps and doing things for herself. She went off the cliff in a rather childish way. She blocked everyone with the last name Marois including her great-aunts and their daughters citing for her reason that we were all toxic. That was something I was more or